New Year's Eve should be the biggest party of the year — so where are you going to have it? One option is to spend £50 to get into an overcrowded nightclub that usually costs a tenner, get ripped off at the cloakroom, wait an hour in the freezing cold for a cab home, then pay treble the usual fare.

Or you could have a house party in the comfort of your own home, with all your best friends around you, your own choice of music and a warm bed upstairs. Even better, you could have a house party at someone else’s place so you don't even have to clear up afterwards.

Clear away the Christmas decorations and bring out the glitter ball, the balloons, the flashing lights and the streamers. Most importantly, take everything of practical, financial or sentimental value, and lock it all securely away.

Everyone should be in their party clothes. If you've eaten a huge amount over Christmas (and let's be honest, who hasn't?), then dark colours will help hide away the rolls of turkey and stuffing while giving a hint of chic. If you're going to somebody else’s party and have to get home afterwards, make sure you have a warm coat and some good shoes — it's going to be either a long hunt for a cab or a bit of a walk.

If you're staying over, make sure you take a comfortable change of clothes. There's nothing worse than sitting in a trashed kitchen the next morning still wearing that little cocktail dress covered with splashes of Drambuie and flecks of vomit.

It's mainly about the drinking and the dancing, but the kitchen is where most of the talking happens and is usually the hub of everything interesting.

You need at least one person to get morose and tearful, usually about either an ex who happens to also be at the party or generally where their life is heading. Other kitchen conversations should include the same hackneyed resolutions from last year, rehashed with no more real belief than before.

At midnight, everyone should gather in the main room for a rousing, cross-armed sing-along to 'Auld Lang Syne,' a volley of party poppers and a huge amount of kissing. If you’re going to make a pass at someone inappropriate — and you probably should — now is the time.

New Year’s Eve should be all about finger foods: sausages, pies, quiches. Get everyone to bring a dish, but make sure nobody turns up with the leftover Christmas turkey — everyone will be sick of it by now. For a kitsch party classic you will need:

• A melon
• Some tin foil
• Some cheddar cheese
• A tin of pineapple chunks
• A jar of spring onions
• Hundreds of cocktail sticks

Wrap the melon in foil. Chop the cheese into cubes. Thread cheese and pineapple or cheese and onion onto the sticks, then jam the sticks into the melon.

Absolutely anything and everything. This is the opportunity for you to finally get rid of that weird bottle of spirit that your uncle brought back from holiday. Stick it on the table secure in the knowledge that someone will drink it even though it tastes like bleach. You need some fizz, but the good stuff is going to be wasted on your guests by midnight. Get some cava or Asti spumante instead. If it’s really cheap stuff, maybe make some Bucks Fizz — two parts orange juice to one part fizz.

1.	Auld Lang Syne / Elvis Presley
2.	New Year’s Day / U2
3.	Hi Ho Silver Lining / Jeff Beck
4.	Celebration / Kool and the Gang
5.	1999 / Prince
6.	Get the Party Started / P!nk
7.	Groove Is in the Heart / Deee-lite
8.	Come on Eileen / Dexy's Midnight Runners
9.	House of Fun / Madness
10.	Kiss Me / Sixpence None the Richer

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