expert party tips

You and your friends just enjoyed a fantastic dinner party when the bill arrives. At that moment, conversations and libations come to a screeching halt. Did someone order an awkward silence? Below are a few tips for hosts and guests to help avoid the sticky situations that can come with the bill.


If you're a host:

• If you’re vehemently opposed to having your guests pay, then consider your budget when choosing a venue. Cooking a meal for a dinner party at your house will certainly be less expensive than footing an entire restaurant bill. Whatever venue you select, be sure to mention that the meal and drinks will be your treat on the Evite invitation so guests know what to expect.

• Decide what role you’d like to play in the party. If you’d like to be the sole host, then understand that you’ll be responsible for the bill at the end of the night. Adding a few co-hosts is an easy way to share the party expenses.

• If you’d like your guests to chip in, let them know beforehand. There are plenty of polite, tactful ways to go about this. For example, add a gentle reminder to your Evite invitation such as, “Separate bills will be provided.” This gets the point across that everyone will pay for what they get without having to say it directly.

• If you have arranged a set price with the restaurant, it is acceptable to ask guests to contribute a per-person charge. Just let them know what they’ll be getting for their money. “The cost will be £20/person, which includes drinks, appetiser, main dish, dessert, service.” But be fair and honest – don’t ask for more than the actual price to “pay for your efforts.”

If you're a guest:

• If it hasn’t been addressed, feel free to ask your host if he or she is expecting guests chip in. Asking whether or not the restaurant will accept credit cards is one way of finding out your host’s intentions without looking overly concerned about money.

• So the bill arrives and the host decides to split the bill evenly among all the guests. This works well for simplicity’s sake, but not for your budget-conscious ordering. Let your host know beforehand that you’ll be ordering light (you can always say you had a big lunch if you don’t want to attribute it to thrift). If the host knows, he or she can speak up on your behalf.

• If you’re a guest who orders a five-course meal plus cocktails, it’s kind to offer to pay a little extra to cover the difference. Or if you notice a guest who is clearly getting the short end of the stick, maybe say something diplomatic like, “I don’t think everyone had cocktails and desserts, so perhaps we should just pay for what we ordered.”